When you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don’t blame the lettuce.
Thich Nhat Hanh
One of the hardest parts of getting out of the cycle of anxiety is escaping the self-blame and self-focus that seem to go hand-in-hand with them.
Breaking away from this type of thinking is difficult (otherwise, people urging you to “cheer up!” or “get over it!” would actually make you happy). The trick here is to find a distraction, something that’s quick and easy to do, and then to do it every time your mood starts to drop.
Sound daunting? Take a breath. You only have to do it right now, the future will happen whether you worry about it or not. Start this list with #1 and work your way down over the course of several weeks, skipping any that don’t appeal to you and repeating any you really like.
If you have any questions or comments, feel free to ask, I’ll do my best to respond to comments.
The List
1- Take five minutes and write down all the nice things you’ve done for yourself in the last 24 hours. Be generous! Don’t forget the simple things.
2- Take five minutes to list the things others have done for you today.
3- Go for a goal-oriented walk.
4- Take five minutes and speed-write a list of all the things that make you happy.
5- Spend ten minutes eating a single piece of your favorite fruit. Notice the textures and flavors in your mouth and hands.
6- Give a small gift to someone as a thank-you for something they’ve done.
7- Leave a friendly note for a stranger, on a slip of paper inside a library book for example.
8- Write someone a thank-you letter and deliver it.
9- Do an assignment on , or spend a few minutes looking at other people’s responses.
10- Do something kind without anyone knowing. For example, you could pick up a few pieces of trash from the sidewalk.
11- Pick an object in your environment that makes you happy and spend five minutes writing the most detailed description of it you can.
12- Listen to your favorite song with your complete attention.
13- Ask yourself: ‘What attitude or belief would make me happiest right now?’ and then take steps toward reaching it.
14- Look around the room you’re sitting in. Make a list of everything smooth.
15- Pick one small chore that needs to be done, and do it, slowly, and with with your full attention.
16- Engage in a conversation with open curiosity.
17- Find a quote, poem, picture, sculpture, etc. that makes you smile and put it by your bedside so you’ll see it first thing in the morning.
18- Take a hot bath or shower, with no other purpose but to relax. Think of all the people who have made that bath possible (people who laid the pipes, who built the water heater, who sent water to your house, etc.). At the end of the bath, silently thank them.
19- Cook a healthy dinner, focusing on the presentation. Then sit down to enjoy it, without distractions.
20- Write a haiku.
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